wow my brother was telling me this joke and he said
“if you’re fighting with a woman and she pulls a knife on you, just pull out the bread and cheese and meat and her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll just make you a sandwich”
then all of a sudden our mom emerges from the kitchen holding a huge ass knife and she approaches my brother asking “sorry what was that?” and he started screaming
(via witchydarling)
white boys be like “im gonna make you come so hard” and ur like, what to my senses
Anonymous asked: fried nigger hearts
the ultimate goal of Destroy Boys 2k14 (other than destroying boys obv) is for me to start receiving hate for it. that’s how i’ll know i’m winning
one time my boyfriend and i were at a party and he tried to scare me as i came out of the bathroom. i karate chopped him in the face so hard he got a nosebleed
periwinkle is totally down with the campaign today there was this guy sticking his fingers in her cage and she DECIMATED his finger like there was blood everywhere it was incredible she’s never done that before
when girls press their whole body against you when they hug, it means they like you a lot. also, they’re measuring your body to determine how long it will take them to eat your flesh, a technique shared by boa constrictors
(via iwilleatyourenglish)
(via witchydarling)
A 12-year-old schoolgirl has been accepted into Mensa after discovering she is brainier than both Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking.
Olivia Manning, from Liverpool, managed to get a whopping score in an IQ test of 162 - well above the 100 average.
Her score is not only two points better than genius German physicist Einstein and Professor Stephen Hawking, but puts her in the top one per cent of intelligent people in the world.
FUCK YEAAAAAH!!!
(and of course the mainstream media won’t even acknowledge this because women doing smart things in math or science? GEDOUTTATOWN.)
This is so awesome!
SIGNAL BOOST! This is AMAZING!
here for brown girls, queer girls, shy girls, bi girls, trans girls, poly girls, disabled girls, loud girls, anarchist girls, riot girls, my girls, the quiet girls - the silent girls, the heart-too-big for their body girls, fat girls, nerdy girls, sexy girls, messy girls, can’t-cook-to-save-their-gramma girls, proud girls, masculine girls, rowdy girls, girly girls, naughty girls, angry girls, surviving/recovering girls, healing girls, don’t-need-saving girls
(via the-noravirus)