Reading my exs blog as a form of self harm
not my fault it keeps showing up in my recommendedsusually i can resist but on dark nights like thesesometimes they reference me in the tags and i get a swift jolt of pain and pleasureim not Angry anymore but im still bitter. and sad. its been 3 years now im afraid ill feel like this foreverits just! i lost my best friend and major life love in a precipitous and alarming manner? and they just continue living?and i have continued access into their thoughts and opinions and life afterwards?? humans werent meant to live like thiswish it was wild west days and they could just leave town and get their friend to write me a letter saying theyd been shot by cattle rustlera clean break... no hard feelingsbut the feelings... are hardi miss them :/