sarah this is my gift to you
you almost made me cry good job are you proud of yourself now
this is too traumatic
i used to love watermelons thank you for curing me
my thanks will consist of projectile-vomiting my bloody uterus into your face
what did you expect man
the person at the table next to us was like “HUMAN FETUS?!?!?!”
and then i was like,,,,,,,,,,,sarah i just remembered i have a present for you