Anonymous asked: give us some barnacle facts
SOME BARNACLE’S FACT
- There’s barnacles.
- They got shells.
- They got cement glands.
- They are full of cement.
- They are not full of cream.
- Some times the shell makes it hard for them to FUCK!
- “Barnacles probably have the largest penis to body size ratio of the animal kingdom.”
- I don’t like that.
- Some times they live on walls or big pillars.
- Some times they live on whales.
- Sometimes the whales don’t like it. But sometimes they don’t care.
- Do you like whales? I like whales.
- Whales are not full of cream. Whales are full of magic.
- They got NO heart and NO gills but I THINK they got souls.
- I think they got bum also.
- It wasn’t clear.
- They got eye.
- The babies are like little larvae that swim about until they get old and find a nice spot. Then they go to this nice spot and they think “hmm, that’s a good spot. i,m going to make cement here.”
- I think that’s right.
- It wasn’t clear. I didn’t look into it much though.
- They look silly when they’re enjoying a snack.
- There’s this kind called Goose Barnacles, or sometimes Gooseneck Barnacles, and they’re called that because they anchor on to things using these big meaty tubes that look like goose necks.
- They’re also called that because in the Old Days people used to think they would transform into geese, or that geese would pop out of their shells, & that’s how geese are made.
- I wish that was how geese are made. I think that sounds delightful.
- Geese are not full of cream. Geese are full of grease and rage.
- Snails eat them a lot.
- Fish eat them.
- Limpets eat them.
- Don’t know what a limpet is.
- Crabs eat them.
- Sea stars eat them.
- I used to think seals eat them but I guess not?
- Do you like seals? I like seals.
- Some seals are full of cream.
- You could eat some barnacles, if you want.
- But only some of them.
- If you want.
- You are probably not full of cream.
- I hope?
- But you COULD be full of barnacles.
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