world’s greatest bowler

pros

• adept use of fingers
• deadly accuracy
• likely owns many shoes
• will eat pretty much anything and love it

cons

• untrained in melee
  
• needs to constantly stop to restock projectiles
• uneven distribution of strength throughout body
• almost certainly bad at all other physical activity

world’s greatest improviser

pros

• encyclopedia knowledge of pop culture will preserve the past
• scrawny body is good for fitting through tight spaces
• is content with not having any money/material things
• probably has good stories about meeting, like, amy poehler

cons

• likely racist and in denial about it
  
• low stamina, susceptible to predators
• overrates how good SNL used to be
• may grow agitated without new pop culture to riff on