Me *goes to job interview*

Me *Is a fake ass bitch*

Me *Tells employer nothing but bold faced lies*

Employer You’re hired!

Me as im leaving the office YOU THOUGHT I WAS A HARD WORKING INDIVIDUAL YOU THOUGHT BITCH! YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO PUT YOUR COMPANIES INTEREST AHEAD OF MY OWN! ALL I WANT IS YOUR MONEY!

Employer What was that?

Me Im looking forward to starting Monday :)