some type of adult girl

witchydarling:

here’s the thing about those self-care posts that have been getting aggressively hated on lately: it feels like people are interpreting it to be like… that’s what you’re supposed to do all the time, drink tea and ignore responsibilities and sit in a blanket cocoon on your bed, it will all be fine!!! take care of yourself!!! the world is cruel and mean so just ignore it and look at pictures of flowers instead of dealing with your responsibilities!!! and then they respond by acting all disgusted and bitter about how it’s completely unrealistic and unhealthy and isn’t recovery and won’t get you anywhere.

but like. that’s not it. you’re interpreting it wrong. and if people are trying to use those posts that way, as an enabling mechanism to never ever ever do anything, they’re interpreting it wrong too. 

those things are meant to be a respite. because the entire rest of the world is already telling someone that they have to get off their ass and slog their way through exhaustion and self-hatred and depression and anxiety and whatever else to be a member of society like they’re supposed to, that they’re lazy otherwise. those sweet and soft self care mechanisms come into play when you really just need something to remind you that life is not always pure hell, that you are already strong for doing what you do and it’s okay if for a little while you can’t be strong or you need to recharge because you just can’t do it anymore.

someone telling you that it’s okay if your spine is not always made of steel can make a world of difference. taking time for yourself can give you the chance you need to pull yourself back together after a really hard week so you can throw yourself back into the fray.

i don’t know what straw-man you’re attacking thinking that the people for whom self-care things are helpful or reassuring are entirely reliant on them or, god help you, avoiding recovery because they desperately want some niceness in their lives, or to hear someone for once saying it’s okay. let me tell you, we all still know life exists and that we have to live it, we know responsibilities need taking care of. some of us, surprise, actually are pretty good at still getting those things done.

if you don’t like gentle self-care posts and tactics, that’s fine. if you’re of the tough love mentality and find it works for you, i seriously respect that. i do. but please for the love of god do not purposefully misinterpret and then make these sneering posts about how people are taking care of themselves wrong. i don’t know what you hope to accomplish by guilt-tripping people like that.