Anonymous asked: hey can you give me some tips about flirting with other girls because i'm bad at this shit
sure! the way i flirt with girls is:
- sweat profusely
- avoid eye contact at all costs, cute girls work kinda like the basilisk
- realize half way through encounter that uve forgotten to breathe this entire time and gasp for breath so u dont die
- give weirdly detailed compliments like “wow your eye lashes accentuate how kind you look when you smile”
- think a lot about how ur brains feel like spaghetti
- leave immediately. go home and lie on your bed for the next 7 hours groaning about how bad you are at flirting with girls
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