GAMER TIP: dont try to berserk rush donald trump on golf course. trump caddies high armor + wield special trumpknife. very hard to kill. recommend stealth
The
loyalesthonestest of friends and the most dependable of ponies
(via magicallittleponies)
What happened was my roommate was complaining about this annoying friend who was always thirdwheeling on her dates whether she invited him or not so my other friend and I started sending him weird stuff from her phone and then some one was like “he doesn’t have YOUR number Molly” and so I started sending him aggressively flirty texts like “I wanna lick peanut butter off your chest ;) ;) ;)” as a joke but he was into it and kept trying to figure out who I was so I told him my name was Angel and I was blonde with D cups and a Swiss accent and he BELIEVED ME SO I started telling him I had a long scaly tail and huge wings and he WAS STILL INTO IT so I started saying stuff like “I’m gonna pluck ur eyeballs out and eat them like grapes” but he KEPT TEXTING ME So I asked him which was better teeth for pubes or pubes for teeth and he said the first one so I was like “WRONG ANSWER BYE” and I thought he’d stop after that but HE DIDNT AND HE STARTED IMPUGNING MY BLOWJOB SKILLS WITH PUBES FOR TEETH so I wrote that incredible piece of literature BUT HE CONTINUED TO COMMUNICATE WITH ME HE’S SENT ME GOOD MORNING, GOOD AFTERNOON, AND GOODNIGHT TEXTS THE PAST TWO DAYS EVEN THOUGH I STOPPED RESPONDING IS THERE NOTHING I CAN DO TO STOP BOYS FROM FALLING IN LOVE WITH ME
This is probably the strangest text I’ve ever sent
one time i was reading about maid cafes in japan and some have spots for tsundere maids where youre paid to insult the customer and that is what id like to do
(via witchydarling)
![thefrogman:
“ [reddit]
”](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d9163ed5903e8151690cd4c3c626cb9c/tumblr_mz89gnWOnz1s2jikwo1_500.jpg)
haha its so awkward when youre digging a hole to hide a body and you find another body.
at least you can hide your body under the body can you say happy coincidence? convenient
(via blessphemy)
Posture was taught very strictly in Victorian England.
In addition to the “Chins-Up-Fork” seen above, tools inflicted upon young boys and girls included the “Shoulders-Back-Saw”, the “Anti-Slouch-Needle” and the infamous “Pelvic-Iron-Maiden”. All have since become staples of BDSM practice.
(via witchydarling)
I like to start all my rebuttals with “First of all, Google ‘false equivalence’”
Midsaggital Section of Rat Cerebellum
Mr. Thomas Deerinck
University of California, San Diego, La Jolla, CA, USA
Technique: Confocal
got the note… thanks, hussie… no need to apologize, it’s been quite an adventure. thank you for letting me into your world.
(& thanks everyone that told me to go back with damara)