apparently i’ve killed 8 people
yeah that’s about how i feel today
real thought that i had today: “should I take this half-eaten banana off my bed? I don’t want to look like I’m trying too hard.”
this white woman at my job with her son “bourbon”
(via meladoodle)
I like how he’s too busy checking himself out to even notice naked couch lady.
F IS FOR FRIENDS WHO DO STUFF TOGETHER
U IS FOR UFOS
N IS FOR ‘NO, MULDER, IT’S NOT FOR UFOS, NOW PLEASE CAN WE JUST GO HOME’
(via onewonderfulbug)
from left to right:
in 5 years, his cousin lenny, from the gay moon future, if he was the Postal Service instead, and Metalmore
(via funeral-gnome)
What if George Zimmerman annihilated DMX in the boxing match? What would happen? It can’t happen? Surely, there can be no universe, no matter how infinite the potential may be, where Zimmerman walks out on top. An infinite amount of monkeys on an infinite amount of typewriters, given enough time, will hurl their jibberish books at his stupid face and shit down his throat.
(via boredn0w)
I just wanna transport my bed to another universe where there is only darkness and stars that would be nice i think
Saw a rat with one red and one black eye, wanted to take it home with me but cats…