holy shit i didn’t know how much i needed this
10/10 would reccomend v useful
i can’t see this post any more because the read more is under my old url but i’m 95% sure its all the lyrics to “all-star” by smashmouth typed out from memory
(via blessphemy)
blessphemy asked: that spaghetti thing is from like a hipster porno where she frick fucks the spaghetti don't ask me how i know
how do you know
And you thought there was nothing good on TV.
its th year 2074. yeti a gay love stoyr is the most-watched movie on planet Earth, a cultural phenomenon. you walk into a halloween party to find 7 people dressed as the character Sex Piss. you look sadly down at your own Sex Piss costume. “finger bang,” you mutter sadly to yourself
(via blessphemy)
fuck u sarah im pouring my heart out and you accuse me of trying to break into the “big game text post hall of fame” (whatever THAT is). and then you don’t even reblog it disgusting
goddamnit sarah how am i ever gonna make it into the big game text post hall of fame if you keep giving me Shit like this
(via blessphemy)
sarah fucked up
you didn’t have to tell the whole internet about it molly
sarah what did you do
(via blessphemy)
like honestly, sleeping next to someone is the nicest thing. like when you half wake up at 4am and squeeze them or they move in tighter to you. lovely.
this is fucking bullshit if u wake me up at 4 am with ur weird cuddle fetish ur sleeping on the fucking floor
(via blessphemy)
This is probably the strangest text I’ve ever sent
Why.
molly i don’t understand the logistics of whats happening in your prose im so confused and so uncomfortable why
(via blessphemy)
If I had to come up with a playlist of soothing sounds to help you fall asleep it would consist 100% of not my roommate talking to her boyfriend on the phone
(via blessphemy)
“I hate life, but I also don’t want to die.”- Sarah
“I don’t actually hate life, I was just saying that.”- Sarah
(via blessphemy)
(via blessphemy)
Ahhhh I look so good I got new jewelry and fancy popcorn in the mail and my friends are mega cute and I love them soooo so so much!! Also there were mozzarella sticks in the dining hall today is a good day nothing can get me down not even scrubbing insect fluids off the floor or the fact that I just coughed up a chunk of phlegm with blood in it or the futility of romantic love
(via blessphemy)
me @ 8:30 am after spending the entire night not starting on the paper that’s due this afternoon: would this be a good time to start semi-ironically photoshopping princess twilight sparkle into pictures of me?
me @ 8:35 am:
what
(via blessphemy)
I’m going to three theme parties tonight: Skanky Goth, Freaks n Geeks, and Sex Kittens…. wish me luck
Nobody wished me luck and this is what happened: 1) i got ultra mega hyper drunk 2) this guy i’d hooked up with came out to me as asexual and i was suuuuuper unsurprisedd 3) i got to kiss the girl i like and it wAS so great i fell all the way onto the floor and it was rly embarassing 4) my knees got all bloody and i look like a cool Blowjob Warrioir but actually i just crawled inside an igloo 4) i just lay on the floor with my body half way inside the refridgerator for like 10 minutes
Good luck
(via blessphemy)