me @all the podcasts i listen to

me @all the podcasts i listen to

liquidstar:

liquidstar:

it’s really frustrating how you have to wait like, 2 weeks before you can drink milk after you buy it. like you gotta wait for the date to be the same as it is on the bottle, i know, but like why cant the store just sell the milk thats ready?

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(via zsnes)

patchesthegreat:

personalgrowthforsale:

lemonvortex:

lemonvortex:

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Women on twitter are sharing weird things theyve seen in bathrooms at guys houses and im fucking screaming why are men like this

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ONE OF THEM HAD A GARDEN HOSE INSTEAD OF A SHOWERHEAD BYE

Why do women hate innovation?

me: caring for my pet lobster, Pinchy

my judgmental gf: lol wtf is this

(via paintpossum)

approximatenews:

Stephen Bannon arrives on Capitol Hill and please ignore the Hampsterdance Song remix our computers are putting that on everything right now and we are unable to stop it

(via sailorbrazil)

larvalhex:

this is the most heavily cursed animation I’ve ever seen, I feel like I just watched the tape from The Ring

(via alvin-flang)

coffeecaine:

Killing Eve season 2 first look

(via partyinthenunnery)

treasures-and-beauty:
“ A rare example of a late 19th century Opal pendant in the form of a cross. The opals are likely from Hungary and the Emeralds from Columbia, made in silver and gold with old mine diamonds.
”

treasures-and-beauty:

A rare example of a late 19th century Opal pendant in the form of a cross. The opals are likely from Hungary and the Emeralds from Columbia, made in silver and gold with old mine diamonds.

slumbermancer:

slumbermancer:

the part of The GRINCH brand-new movie that felt strangest to me was that there were multiple references to God and Christ and Satan in it. not a lot, mind you, but enough that it was noticeable to me. 

and i realize that christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. so maybe this shouldn’t stand out as something that makes me think “huh, this is weird”? but also this is a Dr. Seuss world, filled with Whizzles and Weepums, Wotzits and Wackemmups. 

so my brain is having a hard time parsing the implication that these funny little men revere the teachings of the Bible and Christ the Lord as he wages spiritual warfare against an army of devils, rather than Christmas as an abstract celebration of generosity and goodwill to all

this scans like a joke post but i promise you i am telling the truth. the Whos of Whoville are CATHOLIC.

(via hollowtones)

Uuhhhhh i saw police lights in front of my house and heard the megaphone and it made me nervous bc i was smoking weed but then i heard what they were saying was HO HO HO MERRY CHRISTMAS all the way down my street… blue lives don’t matter

pleatherghost:

pleatherghost:

pleatherghost:

pleatherghost:

you can deal so much damage by just switching articles. β€œi’m so hungry, i could eat the horse.” one-hit k.o.

don’t look the gift horse in a mouth

you can also add horses to other idioms, such as, β€œdon’t count your horses before they hatch.” you can do this in any number of ways

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this is the most powerful addition to this i’ve seen. thanks, furry fricker 69

(via pinktwink)

beetledrink:

i got my DNA test results and theyre negative

(via c3rvida3)

introducing the new sport

nibrocrock:

hyperchaotix:

avant-gardevoir:

basketball 2

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What is the objective?

Survive.

(via thebootydiaries)

thorsbian:

Me: honey im cold can i wear ur wings?

My angel gf:

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(via filmnoirsbian)

thorsbian:

thorsbian:

I just wanna have that capybara vibe

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That capybara vibe…

(via filmnoirsbian)