Unfortunately i think getting older is all about spending more money on sensible footwear and reading nonfiction and getting invested in local politics
When you’re ranting about some annoying habit someone has and your friend is like “I think I do that too :/ ” so your rant is cancelled and now you have to scramble to find a not-too-sappy way to say “but it’s not annoying, Not If It’s You™.” It’s such a trap for the emotionally shy, “yes we are talking about the exact same thing, there is however a crucial difference………” and here the universe picks you up by the scruff of your neck, feeling as mortified as a cat rescued out of a well, and it gently shakes you until something resembling an I love you grudgingly falls out
Caught myself having a detailed conversation in my head to absolve myself of guilt for lying to my librarian. Last time she made an impromptu phone call I was happy to chat, while today I rushed things and said I had a lot of work. It was a lie. My coffee makes the rules, not me. On flower mug days I can chat no problem. If by a stroke of bad luck you call on a fancy mug day then I cannot. Because of the metallic gold rim, you see! It makes this mug unmicrowavable. I can’t reheat my coffee later if you call on Fancy Mug Day. This coffee is lost, I explain in my head, willing her to understand. You can transfer it into another container to reheat it, she counters, reasonably. But that means twice the dirty dishes, I lament. Is my conversation not worth the hassle of washing 1 additional mug? she asks, hurt. I bite my imaginary lip. Sometimes I call to ask if you can guess the unexpected book the nuns borrowed today. I know, and I appreciate it. It was a book about power tools. That’s funny but as I have trouble factoring it in the coffee equation, I settle the matter and decide that lying will be justified if this comes up again. The mug rationale is sincere but rife with complications. This was a productive use of my time. Yet another fruitful imaginary talk, my favourite way to solve delicate ethical quandaries and move forward in life
