Okay so the absolute uncanniness of this video instilled such a terror in me no piece of horror media has ever done before to the point where by the end of it I genuinely thought I might throw up, and the lack of context really made it extra terrifying because in my shock I really couldn’t tell if the footage was real or not (the candid amateur-esque shooting is impeccable)
So I went ahead and dug up some information and this is actually a complication of clips from of a short (like 6 minute) film called The Centrifuge Brain Project that’s actually quite a humourous piece of surreal horror(??? I’m not sure what to call it really) in the form of a mockumentary. I highly recommend it.
As a personal side note I never considered “scientist-engineer with a questionable level of sanity designing horrifyingly dangerous pushing-the-boundaries-of-physics amusement park rides” was gonna end up on my list of Dateable Types but here we are
I have literally wished death upon this man in my group project so many times I’m starting to worry that the secret is real and i could kill him with my vibes
Blobbyland, uhhhh. It isnāt so much a theme park as like a themedā¦.park? idk what you call them. like no rides to speak of itās just a collection of concrete shells of houses where Mr Blobby mascot characters are meant to walk around and interact with guests
Here are some fun and entirely true Blobbyland facts
Blobbyland Morecambe, aka Noel Edmondās World of Crinkley Bottom, opened in July 1994 and closed. in November 1994.
It was meant to save the areaās flagging economy and be the greatest coup of the local councilās careers. Instead it arguably killed Morecambeās entire economy stone dead.
As part of a marketing stunt, a nearby train station changed its name to Bare Crinkley Bottom. this isnāt part of the saga, itās just funny
People genuinely thought this was a great idea. it was literally. Like ten concrete houses and a man in a Mr Blobby suit. that somehow cost the council Ā£300,000 and would have needed 250,000 visitors in the first three months to break even
They did not break even
After a month, to prop up waning visitors, they granted Blobbyland a liquor licence. now it contained ten concrete houses, Mr Blobby, and a lot of very drunk people
They closed it down after 17 weeks and tried to sue Noel Edmonds for its failure
Now they owed Noel Edmonds Ā£950,000 in damages for bringing a spurious suit
The total cost of BlobbyGate was somewhere around Ā£2.6 million of taxpayer money from the people of Morecambe
They never demolished Blobbyland
Itās still out there. Waiting. Mouldering. Regularly being invaded by urban explorers.
Is Mr Blobby also still out there in the concrete corpse of his home in the Lancaster woods? Perhaps. Who among us can truly say?
Thereās also an abandoned Blobbyland in Somerset which is way more complete and therefore horrific in photos, but doesnāt have the distinction of nearly destroying an entire town within 4 months.
